Happy Holidays, with some limitations…

Apple Zombies is usually a blog about what interests me and Scott Porch. That usually means snipets of digital entertainment news, Apple minutiae, or triflings about what we call “Apple Zombies,” those people who mindlessly follow the Pied Piper of Cupertino, and believe even the most minor advance in Apple hardware is groundbreaking stuff, worthy of accolades that would make Al Gore blush. Brains…

But, the most festive time of the year is upon us. So, I thought it would be appropriate for Apple Zombies to take a pause, and wish all those visiting our site, “Happy Holidays!”

That being said, both Scott and I are attorneys, and in light of the current litigious environment, we should mention the following:

This statement of good wishes (”Greeting”) from me (”Sender”) is intended to be generic in nature. “Holiday” is intentionally left an undefined term. This holiday may include, but not be limited to, Christmas, Chanukah, Kwanzaa, New Year’s Day, Saturnalia, or even Elvis’ Birthday (”Elvis” is a registered trademark of Elvis Presley Enterprises, Memphis, TN). Further, the recipient of this greeting (”Receiver”), may insert his or her own holiday into this Greeting, either explicitly or implicitly, or no holiday at all, if he or she chooses. If Receiver celebrates no holidays during the intended period of Greeting, assumed to be roughly mid-December, 2007 through the first week in January, 2008 (”Greeting Period”), he or she may consider Greeting to be merely general, and a simple wish of good feelings and joy, suitable for any time of year, or no time at all.

Greeting should in no way be construed to guarantee or warrant happiness or other good feelings during Greeting Period, or warrant or guarantee an acceptable holiday. By accepting Greeting, Receiver expressly agrees that he or she assumes the risk for his or her own holiday. Receiver will hold Sender harmless should Receiver’s expectations for Greeting Period and wishes contained herein not coincide.

Greeting is at all times subject to withdrawal by Sender, and it may be canceled or modified at any time, without notice to Receiver. In the event of cancellation, Receiver shall receive no credit or proration for any time left in Greeting Period. Greeting is not intended to be transferable, and has no cash value. Under no circumstances may Receiver in any way alter Greeting, or publish Greeting directly or indirectly without express written permission of Sender. Permission may be withheld for any reason within the sole discretion of Sender, with no rule of reasonableness.

Should Receiver not accept the terms of Greeting listed above, no rights or benefits related to Greeting will accrue.

Should a dispute arise from Greeting, Receiver agrees that jurisdiction and venue will be in the courts of Shelby County, Tennessee. Sender and Receiver agree that personal jurisdiction will lie in those courts, regardless of the location of either party. Greeting will be construed under the laws of the State of Tennessee, without regard to Choice of Law or Renvoy.*

*The above disclaimer is Copyright 2007 by Apple Zombies, Peter Baskind, and Scott Porch. All rights are reserved, and may only be used with explicit permission. For licensing information, contact the author at peterbaskind@gmail.com.